Thursday, January 9, 2014

Parent Tested, Kid Approved

So, it appears that I am right on track!  And actually, might be a few days early of my 6 month posting deadline!

I don't think this will be too long of a topic, but that's how it usually starts out. 

Question: How should your children address their elders (and as much as this hurts, "elders" just happens to be your friend that you've known for an eternity).

Answer: (insert long uncomfortable pause).....

There are many theories, or positions, that I've heard on this topic (hence why I am addressing it).  Some of it I feel is based in cultural roots, some is based on tradition or what you grew up doing, and then some...well, there is just no rhyme or reason.

Let's get into specifics.  I have a friend (several actually).  Say I've known this friend for a very long time.  Now I have a kid.  My kid can talk.  How should my kid address this friend? Let's use a "real" name to work through examples.  Say my friends name is Patti.

A.) Miss Patti
B.) Patti
C.) Pay-e (cause we know kids are NOT the best at articulation)
D.) Whatever Patti prefers for kids to call them
E.) Mommy's friend
F.) shouldn't really address mommy's friend because kids should not talk to adults
G.) a name that is acceptable for use by children

I think for the majority of my "old-school" (and I mean that in a good way) friends, the appropriate answer is A.  And I can see this; however I do have a few exceptions --- I find it a little more strange if say the friend was a male.  Mr. "X" just sounds WAY more formal. Also, if Patti happens to be a teacher, I think it will make her cringe to hear another child refer to her by Miss.

So what I want to propose is that every person, above the age of 26, or at least those who have friends who have children need to come up with "G" - a name that is acceptable for use by children.  That way it doesn't seem to be any level of disrespect to having a young person use your government name but at the same time, is appropriate when you are forming a relationship with this child that is "less" than formal.   For example, I have a friend who goes by Wonnie (*this is not the actual name it has been changed to protect this individual, although it may or may not rhyme with Wonnie).  I think that is a perfect kid approved name.

But.......maybe there needs to be 2 names.  The name you want kids you LIKE to call you....and then for those you really aren't too interested in...well, then Miss "government name" is probably the best way for that kid to not get smacked.